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Thursday, November 30

~dis winter~

doinn gewd livin in winter dis year...
tho, wen got bak from aerofloat office wif kak dila, i fell down...
uhuhuh... landed on my hand... hurt lil bit...

amattttt sengal... n i knoe dat fella is goin to d same place like me dis winter hols...
owh God forbid... malasss giler mau bersemuka!!!!
my hand hurt, worry... hopefully wont get reallly hurt, counting d days for Malaysian Nyte....
yups, dis saturday..... later comin up next, Final for Anatomy n Histology!
on the other hand: i'd watched almost 13 different movies in a row.... Fil, u MMg GILA (as usual ryna wud said dat to me) ehehhehe... cant resist it.... if there's any new movies, juz watched it....
besides doin sumthing else, i wud prefer enjoyin myself doin sumthg dat i like.... but, i knoe: studyin is d best.... hell yeah, i really hate dat wen i came to class i'd realized dat i studied d wrong part! hoih, dats bad... i studied d other chapter, i cud never ever imagine how does it feel... my hand was sooooo numb n cold... tryin sooo hard to memorize everythin dat i cud n in the end i got satisfactory for that.... thank god, no neeed to repeat the test or else i wud wastin my tyme repeatin d same chapter...
lets seeee, dis is d list of movies dat i'd watched:
1. bridget jones diary 1&2
2. moulin rounge
3. man on fire
4. armageddon
5. tokyo drift
6. sum cheerleader muvee wic i forgot d title
7. coyote ugly
8. family man
9.etc... etc... tooo much, i cant remember.....
and now: i love to watch musical n sad movies, i love james blunt songs, i tend to eat food dat im allergic toooo.... im cravin for tiramisu n chocolate mousse from secret recipe.... i hav to perform for malaysian nyte.... i havent google d choc chip muffin yet! i miss nasi goreng cheese at swensen...ouchhh, my hand is hurt;(

Monday, November 27

hoPeless

well......
dis whole week were kinda disaster for me because all of the things dat had happened to me....
i'm depressed... im useless
one of d most stupid thing dat i did: i went to d sportzal to play basketball but after i had run 3-5 rounds of the court, i stood and looked to all other players and i talked to myself that i shouldnt be here... im out of mood to play... i dun hav stamina to play.... i am WEAK lazybum...
even more worst, after i did d psychology test and d test had revealed everything... eVerything!
indeed, im speechless.... i knoe it cud be more disastrous... i tend to be irritated and simply fed up wif everyone... i almost let my anger and blame the others for d simple,small n not-dat-important stuff. wut is wrong wif me? pms.... long tyme had ended... psycopath... nope,dats not me.... i think i need help for dis! am i dat hopeless......
its shitty wen u didnt get wut u want and u did study d particular chapter but in the end u sucks at it and u didnt score it!
sum of my groupies notice dat i'd cursed more than i usually did... hell, yeah... d old me is back!
i do hav split personality... like dr.jekyll & mr.hyde.... gewd, nice Filzah no more! i hate dis.... wani asked me not to skip lectures... hopefully, i dont... i had planned my weeks... i hope it will go VERRy smoothly.... how i wish, i wont hear anything, anything dat will hurtin my ear to listen to... i hope dat d nice Filzah will be back... i hope dat i wont have nervous breakdown.... i hope dat i could stay up to study instead of sleepin all nyte ahead till d next morning... i hope dat no one is messin wif my life now... i hope dat i can perform d best durin malaysian nyte... i hope dat i didnt neglect everythin dat happened to my life.... how i wish i can do dat!

Wednesday, November 22

.... dearest s*****

wohoooo...
id received a message from my a fwen of mine...
it was unbeliveable...
owh... for dis sem its happen to me n other gurl...
so wut bout next seM????
ur new luvly roomie????
or she would be ur prey next month huh????

preferably...
i really wanted to slap ur face NOW....
wuts ur problem anyway??
i think u shud make an appointment wif Dr Panova togetha wif ur Bf(ur truly obedient slaves la kannn)

bet if u r readin dis...
big round of applause coz u r definitely heatin me on...
i wanted to explode by now...
like i care wut u say.....
dun u ever notice dat we can live here verrry peacefully without u....
we lead a harmonious life without u B****
by d way, im soooo happy coz u hate me
fyi, u r d first one to hate me but zillions of people livin in dis world love me...
muahahahaha....
dude, boastin bout how big n bagus ur family is not gewd coz u r not dat gewd...
stop spinning d yarn bout how bad people is in ur eyes....
use ur magical mirror (as if u bcan trust it) to reveal the REAL U....
u r messin wif d WRONG people!

Tuesday, November 21

HaPPy burFday To ME ;D
oihhhh... im getttin older!!!!

Wednesday, November 15

...d naked truth...



sumtymes... truth hurts. im writin dis basically without any purpose but id been thinking of these for a long tyme actually. yet, i dunno. im not gewd in words tho... it sucks when u wanted to tell sumone bout sumthing but they understand it in different way wic means dat d particular message dat u wanted to convey to others were misunderstood....

keepin d matters dat keep on botherin urself dat is related to other people to urself is also a big torture, i mean to myself. yet, to understand between each other is important other than the 'chemistry' of two person or more! tellin ur fwens bout hows ur feelin towards them is d best but think before u say sumthg to prevent heartfeelin, anger, revenge etc... try to 'let it go'....
gossipin especially for girls is like routine but dun get me wrong... yess i do, gossipin wif my fwens... yet, guys r d most unbeliveable gossipers in d world (my own point of view)...
its simple, wen u dun like it, juz say it... can we do dat???
probably, it depends... well, its as for me it depends on d situation n my psychology condition: as if bad mood, i would said everythin dat crossed my mind... later, i would regret it but sumtymes its a relief for myself coz id been keepin it for long tyme, waiting for d right tyme for d 'volcano' to erupt!
revenge? not dat bad... still, its gewd to show sum lesson aite?


Friday, November 10

does love ends????

togetha..... nice word aint it? i knoe, but for me... its different its kinda tough tho...
like one of my fwen whos had lots of experience togetha wif all different kinds of guys told me dat guys r all d same... yeah, im agree of it.. summore she admitted dat she's gettin bored to seee her bf every day so dats y there's this phrase: absence make d heart grow fonder.... jeezz, so other gal asked me wut were we talked about, i simply said dat u wont understand d stuff dat we discussed coz u really lurve ur boy... heheh, yes, she knows dat she wouldnt understand wut we meant.... trust, woah.... dis one is really tough one... me n my grupmate did discussed bout it... d guy asked me whether i trust d other gals n i said i dont trust them. we cant trust anyone yet it depends on certain things.... i knoe one of fwen's bf said im understanding yess im...
im enjoying my lifetyme as single... i dun want to hook up wif sumeone for d time being. i knoe the right time will cum..... but, i dun care wut others people said bout me...... juz enjoyed it..... to those who r still whining bout dis... juz stop n theres no time dat is valuable to think about it... appreciate everythin u hav.... those haertbreakers n d players, stop breakin other people hearts...

people, craaappping only. huahuahauha ;D dun bother.....

Thursday, November 9

worrry

--- leavin..
yeah... leavin. basically, when people leave to go sumwhere else, i'll be fine wif dat. yet, it depends on d situation n d person himself. but, im worried bout abah n mama, since both of my sisters are leavin them for a while for their work.... yup, it'll happen to me... i knoe, its d job thinging.. still, i feeel soooo bad bout dat... tho, ryte now mmg ponnn im away from them to study... haish, i dunno.... An, d youngest one who left at home... preferably i dun want to be away from them again... well, i hav to study medicine here in RUssiA... im scared dis would be a big 'pang' from them coz 3 of us r not there... huhuhu, mama's worried face cross my mind... hopefully, my brother would be mooooooore helpful than ever!!!! An juz be goood... ;)
ma, i'll call home sooonn... as soon as i bought d phone card...
mmmuuaaaahhhxxxx....
misssin u guys lotzzz.....

Saturday, November 4

#1: hey, fil! hows russia???
me: erm... yeah fine, tho sum sort of daily probs like d buses are full wif passengers n i cum late for class...
#2: how's livin wif d other students???
me: so n so lah.. since not everyone is nice n there's troublemaker livin up herre... all in all, not everythin went smooth like i always wanted ok!
#1 & #2: yeah, dats true...
uhuhuhuhuh, dats d story, nuthin is perfect n no one is perfect....
how i wish can be like Dr. Turk or Dr. JD in scrubs....
or Dr. House who looks like a psychotic man with his cane...
or Dr. Greys, sweet yet surgeon wif personal probs...
heh, yea la fill keep on dreamin...
i hate it wen im like dis!!!

yesss people, im happy but im not happy wif sum stufff dat happened to me herrrre...
get me out of dis messs!

Thursday, November 2

losing rationality as a result of IMMaTurity


people listen up!!!
say, u r not happy to see dis people
since they r messin wif our lyfe herrre...
i felt like want to kick their buttt n hell yeahhh want them to get out totallly from our lyfe!
tired to hear all those TRUE STORY dat should be revealed earlier...
i mean betta stay away = 1 Terakilometer (TKm) from them,
i really wanted call them BITCHY BITCH but sum say juz wait n see...
haih, mind U its been long tyme i'd never cursing people disss bad...
stil how i wish U to read my post herre in my blogs n giv it up...
stop all those stuffs dat u'd plannned...
U make us suffer...
but, dont U notice dat u r sufferin toooo
juz wait n see, n Only GOD knows when n how...
when It is d PAYBACK tyme,
dun make ur PATHETIC face to us....
no FREE HAND will simply lend to U,
seeee im soooo sick offff u...
im waitin d ryte tyme to spill dis offf on U
U hav d tyme to regret...
rethink bout wut U had done...
dont u ever realized dat U r d most hateful person on earth...
be RATIONAL coz im sooo sick off IMMATURITY.
tho i wonder how u were brought up,
forgive me if i blame it on ur parents....
such spoilt brat,
dude, ask urself...
U r not d Superior One....
Open the HOly Quran n U'll see who IS the ONE n OnlY : THE ALMIGHTY.


p/s: other people, pray hard for them so that they will find the RIGHT PATH sooooon :)
GOD, plzz forgive us for every sinful things dat we'd done n Help us so dat we can lead a peaceful life here in dis world before we r taken back to the eternal life........